farewell my friend

First let me say thank you to whoever it was that called me and left a message saying Joann had passed away.

It was someone from the Haven staff and I really don’t remember who it was. I remember them apologizing for giving me the news in such a way. I understand that it must have felt awkward and maybe even heartless to share the news on voicemail, and I want to let you know I really appreciated your thoughtfulness in contacting me, voicemail message or not.

 

Later Wednesday night, after I heard the news, I got together with friends for our regular Wednesday night check in. We all spent time talking about who Joann was to us personally and remembering different ways she had impacted our lives. I remember hearing words like ‘steal’ and sterling, and grand old lady, and gentle and loving, and honest, and tough and bitch (“I always ask how do you feel about bitches?”) all through a haze of shock, I suppose.

 At the end of our check in, standing in our circle, my eyes closed, all I could see was Joann’s smiling face, with that twinkle in her eye that she often had when she laughed at herself and one of her Joann-isms. The tears flowed freely with the realization that, although she will remain with me in many many ways, the opportunities to see and touch her in a physical way are gone.

I am sad about that, and yet I am filled with gratitude for having known her, and to continue to know her in a very real way as I continue my life with her teachings and her particular way of being mixed in there in some way. I have been blessed by her and I am grateful.

 

With loving always

Renee

 

The indispensable first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: decide what you want!

- Ben Stein